The letter

When was the last time you thought of me or you erased me from your memory , you still same for me my, lil girl who sent me kisses to start my day texted me every day and night… took my breathe away . still your old text flash me inside my mind force me to read and remember it all again ,my those last message still shine up screaming out …….your non replaying strike over my heart, which still hopes for your reply but deny to hate you …..still loves you for teaching me that is so hard not to feel rejected .
you thought me the meaning of being lonely and thought me that some people come you your life just to make you believe that your life will never be the same without them. Do you ever been so sad that you cant cry anymore that you actually silent ,you not yelling anymore ? I guess not because if you ever felt i would have not been in this misery .you were essential to me the air i breathe and i believed that without you i have no reason to be. 
you used to share your every life event with me what gone so bad that you started hiding the things that were my rite to know, but atleast let me know that the girl i could have died for… disconnected the phone lines for no fucking reason ,so that i can hack my life up for a accurate reason .
these wall shouts at me feels like closing in …..the roof it feel like caving in ,push me under my bearing capacity tells me that you no longer the same person. My phone i think it doesn’t pops up your text that’s why i keep on calling your number but it just keeps on dialing , fix it ……. Fix it for sure it got some problem because you ignoring me is the same as day i dont think about you…. Its impossible .
my friends talk about us but all it dose is breaks me up ,i know you not there for me but my heart he doesn’t believes the fact . i knew the time will come when i have to let you off my arms but it will come so soon and that too in this manner i dint knew. 
You still the most special girl to me more than anything , you were my strength to build me up , a hand to hold me ,the girl i shaded my tears for ……… I’m not writing it to let you know or let you read it i know you dont believe me but that’s the only feel i got , the words they dont finish up no more ,the more they come out as my tears roll down my face . if you ever come back no yelling no scolds no crying over you no more fights i will learn from my mistakes i promise .
Now m tired of chasing i wanna be chased , m tired of crying i want someone to make me smile , m tired of writing pages full of emotional shit i wanna get a single word text message , m tired of trying to let you go i want someone to hold me , m tired of feeling worthless i want someone to make me feel special , m tired of spending crazy nights i wanna get a sweet good night text , m tired of missing things i want you to miss me , m tired of feeling ignored i wanna be adored , m tired of shedding tears i wanna laugh with you , I’m tired of loving i wanna get loved ,

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